Not only are they declassified, they are available on an easy to use website!

Lifting the veil of secrecy is the easiest way to convince people that all the sightings have been hoaxes, hallucinations or comets (unless, of course, we really are covering up some crash-landed spacecraft).

The French site classifies the sightings into four groups; group “D” consists of the reports that remain unexplained. For those who don’t speak the language, Google translator should be enough to get the basic ideas.

Once again, the French are able to see to the heart of American politics in a way that Americans themselves cannot.

The French newspaper Le Monde has had the best coverage of the 2008 election that I have yet to find.

Check out this pretty, colorful map that even an English-speaker can understand.

We all know that Americans are largely, when it comes to geography, what is known in the technical jargon as “pirate-shaming dumbasses”

But the French can now claim the greater distinction of being Copernicus-denying, Galileo-frying dumbasses.

I’ve always heard that people all over the world love our culture, and hate us for our foreign policy; the implication when people say this is usually something like ‘the rest of the world is right; our foreign policy is terrible and our culture is great’.

I’ve always thought that American foreign policy, in spite of its very numerous shortcomings, rarely deserves the sort of rich, deep hate people manage so often to conjure up about it.

But I had also believed that American culture was as great as the rest of the world is supposed to think it is.

In a way this is true; there are many wonderful facets of our culture, truly great music and literature and film.

Unfortunately, these aren’t the things that other people love about our culture.  They like films that speak the universal languages of sex and big explosions.  They love celebrities.

Most of all, they like club music.

I’ve heard more American hip-hop and rap in a month and a half around French teenagers than I did in two years in college in the US.

It’s as if the rest of the world can only reach the golden streets of American culture by crawling though or gutters.

The rude Frenchman is one of our most cherished stereotypes, but I’m afraid that it is only very loosely based on reality.

In fact, if you speak their language and you know how to treat them, they’re just about the politest people in the world; they always say hello and goodbye, please and thank you, and generally seem more genuine about it.

I certainly wouldn’t call them the nicest people in the world; but very polite, very much not rude.  Unless, of course, you really find a way to provoke them.  I think of Americans in the South, who are normally both nice and polite- right until you and your yankee accent start talking smack about the Confederacy, the church, grits, or whatever it is they hold dear.

I saw an incredible counter example last weekend in Paris.  We were eating lunch in  a working-class neighborhood near the northern gates when an old woman fell crossing the street.  The local French people leapt into action- one making sure she was alright, another stopping traffic, another picking up the groceries she’d dropped.  I would have impressed to see such quick, competent kindness in the US; I was stunned to see it in Paris, purported to be the rudest city of France.

Glad to be wrong about this one!

Most people in the US have never heard of Carrefour; but it is after Wal-Mart the biggest retailer in the world, and it was started in France.

The one in Antibes stretched my imagination.

I’d been in France for two weeks or so; I’d seen innumerable small shops, bakeries, restaurants.  The biggest store I’d been to was the grocery store, which is tiny by American standards.  I thought that was just how France was.

Enter Carrefeour- a big box store twice the size of a super-Walmart, with 70 checkout aisles and just about every sort of product imaginable-food, clothes, books, computers, furniture, appliances, dirt bikes and motorscooters, and most importantly the most wine I’ve ever seen in one place.  If this way of shopping isn’t classy enough, it’s surrounded by a mall.

I was baffled by how the French could build something so out of keeping with what seems to be their national character; I guess when a nation takes something to an extreme it will inevitably provoke a reaction, and in this case the reaction looks like Carrefour.

I can’t think of any contrasts quite so sharp in the states; perhaps because regionalism and federalism allow for more diversity.  Looking for them though…

Advanced French

This is the class we spend talking with our really cool teacher about what there is to do around here.

Tout en francais, bien sur.

Elementary Spanish

Because learning one language at a time would be too easy.

Really though, its fun to be a beginner in another romance language. Learning languages is kind of like putting together a puzzle. Learning French, Spanish, or Latin, we start out with a bunch of edge pieces together.

Calculus 3

Tried this one freshman year; it was hard, 10 am was too early.

So now I’ll give it a try at 830 am, and in French. Huzzah

Media Literacy

Learning how the media fails in its mission of objectivity… it’s like watching the Daily Show, but not as funny.

I’d heard that the French, and Europeans in general, dress to look ‘nice’ compared to most americans; this is certainly true, and as I look around here I can see everyone dressed impeccably compared to me in my old t-shirt.

I suppose it’s a good thing to look good; it’s a better thing though to spend less time and money on something the isn’t that important.

Of course, people will always find ways to be irrational; and if you want to fight them at an individual level, you will pay a social price.  I’m sure I’ll end up conforming on this one; some fights against human nature, I’m beginning to realize, aren’t really worth the effort.

In the short to medium term, I think a much more fruitful project than talking sense into people is to turn irrationality to positive, productive uses.

So hurrah for us hoodlums in the US who made it cool, at least for some people some of the time, to wear the oldest and cheapest clothes they have.

But I suppose the French have come a long way since the days when keeping up with court fashion could bankrupt an aristocrat.

I had heard that food, along with most things, is more exprensive in France; and this is largely true.

But when a country really appreciates something, they get very good at making it.

Decent bottle of wine: under 3 Euro

Hunk of Brie twice the size of my hand: under 3 euro

6-pack of good German beer: under 3 euro

10-pack of mediocre French beer: under 3 euro

The best croissant you’ve ever had, plus apricot and chocolat varieties of the same: under 1 euro

 more to follow

A couple revelations here.

I’d always wondered why guys would wear speedos and women’s bottoms to the beach when all it’s going to do is make people cringe.

And then I realized- it’s fun to make people cringe! Maybe I’ll try it sometime.

On a more serious note, I had heard from a lot of people that almost everyone who goes nude/topless to beaches is really old, and like the proverbial man in a speedo they’re likely doing it to make people cringe.

I would like to state emphatically for the record that this is *not true*.

That is all.